Curiospen

I had been traveling for more than a week now,  thousands of kilometers away from Home, sitting on a beach with cool breeze hitting my face and the loud ocean waves hitting the rocks, I was completely lost. I didn't know where I came from, where I was going to go or where my "Home" was. My mind completely blank and the only thing I knew at that point was the small hotel room that I had reserved. That was my home. I forced myself to remember where I came from, where I belonged and I saw my home, in a small village in Gaya. Being there, having travelled through so many places, it was hard to even believe that I belonged there. For some reason I just didn't feel like I belonged there. It felt like its been years since I left that place.  It was such a weird feeling. Something I had never experienced before. I have been struggling more and more with mixing in for last few years. I stand out like a sore thumb everywhere, and its hard to  even imagine somewhere I truly belo...

Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Though wise men at their end know dark is right, Because their words had forked no lightning they Do not go gentle into that good night. Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight, And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way, Do not go gentle into that good night. Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. And you, my father, there on the sad height, Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. - Dylan Thomas

 Recently I came across this Quote by Franz Kafka.  “All Language is but a poor translation”.  Or as I like to say it, “A language is nothing but a poor translation of feelings”. And the more I think about it, It makes more sense.  On first thought, this idea seems conflicting. We made the languages, and every culture in the world should have perfected this skill to be able to express themselves completely, right? Well, Not really.  I am fortunate enough to know more than one language and I can see this gap between languages where no one is really perfect to be able to express ourselves completely.  Even with my native language, Urdu. There have been times when I have felt a certain way towards someone or towards myself and did not know how I could have expressed that. And I am sure you must have felt this way too. There are some things that just can not be expressed in the most perfect way that we would like to express them. No matter which language we use...

It’s the Hijri New year today. Does not feel like it, in fact when I woke up today, I expected everyone to have a post about new year on their WhatsApp statuses. But I did not find any, Then I found out that we did not see the moon yesterday. And new year is on Thursday/Friday instead of Wednesday/Thursday, Depending on which part of the world you are in.  In our Muslim culture here, celebrating any kind of date is frowned upon. Birthdays, New Years or even anniversaries. They are all connected with the idea that our deaths are coming closer. so why should we celebrate? and to be fair, it does make sense. with every passing day and every passing year. weather its our birthday or a new calendar year, we all are getting closer to our deaths. and none of us are prepared to what comes after death.  Another reason that people give, for not celebrating any kind of “dates” is the idea of replication of non-Muslim culture. And that also seems true, at least in India, this idea of cele...

A man was travelling through India, He was a foreigner and he had never seen an elephant. He passed through the house of a man who owned elephants. The foreigner saw the elephants chained with a very thin rope.  He asked the owner, "How is it that the elephant does not break the rope and runs away?". The owner smiled and replied. "The elephant does not know that he can easily break the rope. There is no rope in the world that this elephant can not break. So when these elephants were small, we chained them using a thin rope. In the start they tried a lot to break the rope, but they were not strong enough at that time to break them. and slowly they started to believe that this rope was unbreakable and they gave up. This is the only way to keep them chained. The moment they know that they are now strong enough to break the rope and run away, they will easily do that".  There is another common belief that due to the small, spherical and convex nature of an elephant'...

“ Whatever is happening why is it happening ?  You don’t know, neither do I. …. Is the story inside of us ? or are we inside a story?  …. Life is like the water from rain, lets store half of it and let half of it wash away.  ….. Are we a drop in the ocean ?  or, are we the entire ocean?  …. is life more than our needs?  or is it less than what we need? …. Is the story inside of us? or are we inside a story?  ” I love the above lines, they are from a very underrated song. These lines truly reflect this feeling inside of us. Sometimes we feel so smart, so confident, like the entire world was made for us and we are the main character of the story. We take stupid risks without thinking about others. But sometimes we feel so small in the world that we feel worthless. Like the world does not care a single thing about us.  I think reality lies somewhere in the middle, as always. I would like to think that I am a drop in the ocean, at the same time I am t...

I remember about a movie that I watched. Its called “lost in translation”. I think I remembered about it because I saw a post on social media that its director who was in a relationship with another director had recently went through divorce. And she made this movie to tell her side of story.  The more interesting thing is that a few years later his ex husband also made a movie called “Her” and he casted same lead actress.  The story of “lost in translation” is of a man. He goes to japan for a business trip and gets frustrated with the language barrier between him and the world. He feels very lonely and then he meets a girl, who was also american and had come there with her husband and her husband was so busy in work that she felt neglected. They dont exactly fall in love. but what they showed in the movie felt a lot like extramarital affair to me. And obviosly I did not like it. I dont know why I got reminded of it suddenly, but now that I think of it, the director misunderst...